focal point

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I messed up.

Frozen hands, settled soft pastel dust and three sets of big round eyes asking, “What do we do next, Ms. Clark?” I had spoon fed these Advanced Art students too many suggestions.

While making art the student needs both individualized instruction and independent time for trial and error. I do a great deal of the first, but because modern play has become less creative and more technical, I think independent problem-solving tasks have to take priority in our classrooms. Though I must conference and check for comprehension, I’ve learned that just leaving students be for chunks of time is key to promoting self-reliance. 

As a grade school student, I would cringe when teachers stood behind me, especially if I was just starting the task. I sense this same tension in many students when I watch them work. In contrast, are students who show obvious signs of discomfort with independent learning. These children especially need to be challenged out of their stagnant comfort zones. Ralph Waldo Emerson’s wisdom comes to mind, “It is a low benefit to give me something; it is a high benefit to enable me to do somewhat of myself.” My most rewarding moments as a teacher come when I’m not teaching. The room is silent and my students have forgotten about my judgment, guidance, approval and physical presence. In fact, they have become so absorbed in the making of art that they have forgotten their classmates as well.

Making art isn’t easy.

The intellect does not yawn and curl up for a nap while the artist’s hands labor but is challenged beyond limit. The brain must in-vision, invent, connect, analyze, evaluate and build. While the mind sorts and solves, the human spirit weaves in an expressive or descriptive narrative. Focused concentration is required. When it breaks, mistakes are made. 

I still catch myself holding my breath when I paint or draw. I guess subconsciously I think that simultaneous breathing and drawing is multi-tasking, and therefore, compromises the art. This is a bad habit that I someday hope to break. I know how my students feel both before and after the mistake. But a second sheet of paper times X amount of students per day can really eat up a modest budget. Saffell student know that their chances of getting a second sheet of “good” paper are slim to none. I usually meet, “I messed up” with, “I don’t care about mistakes. I care about learning.” The primary reason for my frugality, however, is resourcefulness. I hate to see waste.

To start over is to waste a mistake. And here lies a fundamental difference between art and most other subjects. In art a mistake could be an opportunity to change your plan. I had a printmaking professor in college who encouraged us to examine errors for opportunity. Though he was a tough critic, he taught us to keep our eyes peeled for serendipity. Even if a mistake does not provide an effective way to change the art, it still offers insight. If the best option is for the art student to “start over,” he or she should remain conscious of the mistake. Is it not true that even in our personal lives (if we are responsible people) we learn more from our blunders than our accomplishments?

That vacant space in front of an artist can be intimidating, yet space is the most essential and first used Element of Art. I think that art teachers’ biggest challenge is to help students overcome that fear. I usually have students practice the task before starting the assessed assignment. I encourage them to draw with their fingers first and to create a mental image before ever making a mark. Much of drawing is thinking and seeing. Often I have kids draw with crayons to develop light and loose sketching techniques. This is a handy way to include mistakes as part of the process. Crayon cannot be erased. Sometimes the simple fact that a mistake “bugs” a student, makes it an effective teaching tool. Art comes from the soul just as much as it does the mind so students are honest about what they’ve done. Sometimes when I give praise, a child will counter, “Yeah, but look, I messed up right here.” It is gratifying when a student can tell me exactly how he “messed up.” THAT is genuine high quality learning! It isn’t memorization to get a quick “A” on a test only to forget the content days later, but truly earned learning.

By helping too much I had allowed my Advanced Art students to rely on my sight more than their own. I sympathized. You see, their drawings are good—- really good! They were proud and surprised that their ten-year old hands had made these pictures. But pride and fear travel in a pair. I told them to be brave and figure out the next steps on their own. It was time to risk the end for the means and make some mistakes.

Some may disagree, but I value the process more than the product. I have never been completely satisfied with anything I’ve made. I may like some pieces better than others, but I’ve never judged any of my work as perfect. I’ve sometimes wondered if total satisfaction would suppress my drive to make art. I doubt I’ll ever know. Of course, I love the finished product as much as any craftsman, but the product belongs to the viewer or consumer just as much as the maker. It is the process—- mistakes included that becomes a part of the artist. It is the doing or re-doing that hones the skill, sharpens the mind and reveals the soul.   

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Hoping this “wholesome” docudrama wouldn’t require too much thinking on my part at 9:00 p.m, I reluctantly inserted A Man Named Pearl. Already regretting my Netflixs choice I skeptically watched Pearl, burdened with cumbersome work boots and armed with a chainsaw, climb to claim a piece of sky for his work. As it is easy for the observer to do, I immediately passed judgment, “That old fellow must be a little off. He’ll fall and break his hip.”     

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